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Thursday, January 30, 2025

The Quiet Ache of What Could Have Been



Valentine's Day is around the corner, and before everywhere turns red, the price of flowers skyrockets, restaurants run out of bookings, and taxi prices get even higher, we'll be bombarded with gift ideas for him and her. Then, there are those who are feeling down because they don’t have a partner and others preparing for first dates. But before we get caught up in all of this, let’s take a moment to discuss something else—a feeling, or perhaps a moment in life, that I'm not sure many can relate to. This might resonate more with those who have come of age, the older generation, or those who have experienced life in different ways.

Maybe they just needed a little patience. Maybe they needed a little confidence, or maybe they just needed time. You saw them and knew, but the point in your life where you were at didn't allow you a chance with them. And so, you buried them—yet, they keep rising to the surface of your heart.

It's not hard; it just is. You're not sad, but you don’t quite know how to feel about it. You don't regret where you are in life now, but you know it could have taken a different turn that would have also been good or maybe. Words can’t quite explain how. The memories are sweet, though you never had them. Things didn’t fall apart; no moves were made. Maybe it was fear—your fear, their fear—or maybe it was just time that didn’t allow things to happen. Perhaps you lost contact after that first meeting, or after however many times you crossed paths.

But you know, in your heart, there was something real or felt like real or without a definition but kept lingering. A love so deep, even the earth would have been jealous of it. Some of you still see them; some of you haven’t in years. And for some, they've passed away. And then comes the silence—the silence that has never been broken, because you’ve never spoken of it to anyone. But your heart carries it, tucked gently in a quiet corner. You can’t suppress it. You simply learn to ignore it, because that’s just how it is now.
Each time you hear someone bring them up, there’s a quiet pause, a slow moment you don’t even know how to explain.

The hug—you imagine it would have felt magical, but that’s not quite the word because you never felt their skin. When you sat close to them, your heart skipped in a way you couldn’t define. You never spoke about it. Words failed you. Silence was your language—just moments of unspoken connection. It could have been everything or nothing, but even without a single promise or commitment, their presence was enough.

And it’s okay that it never started. No one faults you for it; it simply didn’t happen. No goodbye, no words, just a peaceful silence. It was like a medicine you never tasted—one of the happiest moments, years, or times of your life, even if it was just a glimpse that passed too fast. But no bad blood, no regrets.

People who have experienced this mostly don’t speak about it. They just carry those people in their hearts—no fantasies, no grand imaginations—just a knowing. A quiet understanding that it would have been something the world has never experienced, something special. But still, they’re thankful for their present. Respectful of it. Comfortable, and still loving it. 

If you're reading this, I just want you to know: it’s okay to leave them there. It’s okay to leave them in that gentle part of your heart. It’s okay to smile, to dance with them in your heart. It’s okay to sometimes look back, to blend those memories in, and it’s okay to never speak about it. Because life happens, and that’s just it.

Life, oh life... it’s just what it is, right? And it’s okay to be okay and not be okay, to appreciate the process, but never dwell. What would have been is never fully known until it’s done. It’s okay to leave it unspoken.

And here, I take a deep breath.

If you can relate to this, it’s okay to share your story in the comment section below. If you cannot relate to it, it is okay to reply to other comments, ask questions, and feel free to express yourself. It’s just part of life.

What is this type of feeling called? How does this speak to you?

Photo by Ray Bilclif
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78 comments

  1. Czasami trzeba brać to, co daje nam los. Nie jesteśmy w stanie wszystkiego przewidzieć.

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    Replies
    1. True, life throws curveballs, and sometimes all you can do is roll with it.

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  2. Non amo queste "festività commerciali", ma un giusto equilibrio di vita, che mi permetta il più possibile, un percorso ragionato e armonico.
    Buona serata

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  3. Hi Malody!
    Valentine's Day, in my opinion, is a nice holiday, but we should remember: it's not just a holiday for lovers! Valentine's Day is a special day of love and showing good, positive, heartwarming feelings to each other❗🧡💙💚💛
    Let's also remember that today's day called the lovers' holiday originated in antiquity combining pagan and Christian traditions.
    Melody, I salute you!

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  4. I agree with Anna. You can Valentine's with family members and friends. I know you have lots of people you love.

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  5. What an interesting topic for Valentine's Day, Melody. Yes, I think I have experienced what you are talking about, but it's been many decades. I had a habit of falling for boys/men from age 7, but I'm certain that most of them had no idea of my feelings. I had one particular male friend in college who called me 'Love Child' because I would confide in him about my crushes. The crazy part was that I ALSO had a crush on him. He never seemed to feel that way about me. We lost touch after college, but I've used my internet sleuthing skills and discovered he's living in Florida. He will always have a special place in my heart.

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  6. Uy como tu dices casi todos experimentamos es entre realidad y fantasía ente lo que fue y lo que soñamos o recordamos. Yo no celebro el día d el amor ese celebra cada día con cada pequeño detalle. Te mando un beso.

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  7. Valentine's Day is a day for love, but not just for romantic love. There are all types of love. I remember being a teenager early twenty-something though and how hard it was when I thought about Valentine's Day as just a day of romantic love. Of course (smile) now that I am married and have been with my partner for a long time, we don't do anything for this holiday at all. But it's all good. Thanks for this post.

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  8. Every day is Valentine's Day! Celebrate every day as a blessing.

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  9. Boa noite de Paz, querida amiga Melody!
    É uma pena que muitos só comemoram socialmente o dia... Amor passa longe de muitos corações.
    Que reine o Amor na Terra.hijelll.hoje e sempre!
    Tenha um Dia abençoado!
    Beijinhos fraternos

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  10. There is someone I think about periodically and wonder. I made a choice though and don’t have any regrets but I wonder…

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  11. In Russia we don't celebrate Valentine's Day. We have another holiday - Day of Love, Family and Fidelity on July 8.

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  12. Beautifully written. It resonates deeply. 💔

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  13. You are such a thoughtful writer! I hope you have a wonderful Valentine's Day, however you spend it. X

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  14. A very touching text... but the idea is sharing love...love that should be present every day of your life and not only in Valentine's day.
    All the best
    Marta

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  15. Si pudiera volver atrás en el tiempo haría las cosas diferentes en relación a muchas personas.
    Pero no es posible.
    Además ahora miro el pasado con ojos expertos y no es justo recriminarse por lo que no fue.
    Recuerdo mi primer amor... y a veces pienso: porqué la dejé escapar?
    Fui tonto?
    No supe cómo actuar?
    Y ese sentimiento se ha quedado clavado para siempre en mi corazón.
    Pero con el tiempo he aprendido a que las cosas no son solamente como uno las siente o piensa... muchas veces no sabemos discernir la verdad porque los sentimientos nublan nuestro razonamiento.

    Saludos y buen fin de semana.

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  16. That is a feeling we all sometimes have. Would not have it been better if we could all express our feelings to others or send some secret signals so that they would know how we feel? I believe they often feel the same, but we are all lost to each other due to being scared of rejection or uncertainty.

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  17. Honestly I'm never been a good fan of Valentine's day, now I'm single nd I love spend time with myself, my animals, my family and friends, but sometimes society looks you and seems that you are in a wrong way because you haven't kids, partner or other things. But a woman is complete also without these things. Sometimes silence is the better way, when you'lll be really good with yourself it'll be a read win.
    Have a lovely weekend

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  18. I like Valentine's Day but not the consumerism around it. And if you're bad in the rest of the year but not in this day, you're bad in this day, too.

    I don't buy anithing with heart's or red... We prefer to go eat somewhere nice, not that expensive and have more experiences than stuff to filled in the house.

    Kisses

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  19. I've never experienced what you're writing about, but you described it very beautifully.

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  20. Your words really speak to me. It's like carrying a quiet echo of someone in your heart, a gentle "what if" that lingers over time. Sometimes, life leads us down paths where certain connections remain unspoken, yet profoundly felt.

    I think this feeling might be called a wistful longing or unspoken affection. It's comforting to know it's okay to cherish these memories silently. Thank you for sharing this heartfelt reflection.

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  21. Olá, Melody, percebo que esta é uma data a comemorar para namorados, bem diferente de casados, marido, esposa, filhos... onde há mais compromissos, mais cumplicidade, mais responsabilidade, mais amor - de uma maneira mais completa. Uma forma de ver a vida diferente. Para mim diz respeito aos namorados, apenas.
    Gostei muito de seu texto!
    Um ótimo fim de semana!
    Abraços!

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  22. You are such an amazing writer! I loved this post and I’m with you, truly Valentine’s Day can be about anyone and truly anything that you love! It’s celebrating love and the world needs more of it!

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  23. ...why not make every day Valentines Day???

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  24. O dia dos namorados é uma data bonita e romântica, está sozinha nesse dia não é o fim do mundo apesar que muitos acham. Melody bjs.

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  25. Sometimes it's better to leave it unspoken...and we don't actually celebrate V-Day..I have a feeling that young people love this day.

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  26. Creo que como dicen algunos es un día especial para todas aquellas personas que tienen pareja y que creo esta muy comercializado y por esa razón como nos dices ese día los precios se disparan.
    Y como nos dices hay personas que a día de hoy no tienen pareja bien por haberse roto la relación o por que nunca la tuvieron tal vez por alguna circunstancia de la vida que les freno a la hora de proponérselo a esa persona que talvez hoy sería su gran amor.

    Saludos.

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  27. Lo que has escrito sobre las oportunidades perdidas en el amor nos ha pasado a muchos. Haber conocido a alguien que nos llegó al corazón y sin embargo nunca se dio la posibilidad de experimentar ese amor.
    Yo recuerdo con cariño a un chico que conocí hace muchos años pero en ese momento no fui capaz de decírselo, tenía algo especial, incluso ahora sonrío cuando pienso en la última vez que lo vi. No sé lo que hubiese sucedido si me hubiese atrevido, realmente tenía algo que me me hacía sentir bien. Aunque no me arrepiento porque la vida me preparaba un gran amor que vino después, pero siempre tendré en la memoria a esa persona que era, y aún es capaz, de sacarme una sonrisa al recordarle.

    Besos.

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  28. Good evening Melody.
    Valentine's Day, I must say, has never said anything to my heart. Perhaps because, due to my age (65), it came very late in my life and rather in a way that was about business than about life itself. So I never celebrated it with a loved one.
    Of course, we have several other dates on which we celebrate love.
    Many kisses, my dear friend.

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  29. There really should be a word for nostalgia for something that never happened, right?

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  30. What a beautiful post, Melody. I do know what you're talking about, both about Valentines Day and that gentle longing. I have that for a boy, well old man now!, from my early teens. I met him again in my twenties, and the old attraction was still there but we were both married to other people. I never saw him again, but often think of him.

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  31. Tremenda reflexión, Melody...Todos tenemos momentos de nostalgia, recordamos a seres amados, que se fueron o que no tuvimos la oportunidad de conocer y profundizar en su corazón...El día de S.Valentín nos trae el amor, pero también lejanos recuerdos. No obstante, la vida y el destino también nos impulsan a tomar decisiones, que debemos afrontar con valentía y mejorar esa convivencia con las personas, que permanecen cerca de nosotros. Todo tiene un orden y un sentido cada día empieza la vida, amiga.
    Mi abrazo entrañable y admirado.

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  32. Never been a "what if" person, I guess. But this was beautifully written. :)
    I've no regrets. Made some "interesting" and sometimes negatively eventful decisions, but I learned something positive along the way. Wouldn't change anything...even the traumatic stuff...because then I wouldn't be who I am today. Oh, and I think of Valentine's Day as a day for love in general....kind of like Christmas love for everybody is for me. :)

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  33. Such a beautiful, heartfelt and poignant post, Melody and I think you were very brave to post this. I know exactly what you mean. There are some people you pass like ships in the night, but still you can't help wondering what might have been. Thank you for sharing your innermost feelings. xxx

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  34. Saludos, Melody. Gracias por pasar por mi espacio muy interesante tu blog.
    Un abrazo.

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  35. What a special post. Thank you for sharing. May love and joy be with you.
    www.rsrue.blogspot.com

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  36. You write with so much beauty, honesty, and heart. I am often so inspired by your posts and the way that you see people. What you said about "a knowing" was so lovely. You have the heart of a poet. I am just so in awe of your writing style, your kindness, and your ability to really see the world in a deeper way.

    the creation of beauty is art.

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  37. Absolutely amazing photography in your Blog Melody. A pleasure to visit.

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  38. Nos dias que correm não dou importância ao dia dos namorados. Estou divorciado. Vivo só. E não tenho qualquer relacionamento. No entanto, é importante comemorar esse dia, principalmente quem está a viver uma relação. Embora, eu entenda, que o dia dos namorados são todos os dias.
    Excelente texto para reflexão. Gostei bastante, amiga Melody.

    Deixo os votos de um feliz fim de semana, com tudo de bom.
    Beijinhos, com carinho e amizade.

    Mário Margaride

    http://poesiaaquiesta.blogspot.com
    https://soltaastuaspalavras.blogspot.com

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  39. Que texto intenso e cheio de delicadeza! 💙 Cada palavra carrega uma melancolia silenciosa, mas sem dor — apenas a presença serena do que poderia ter sido. Como é bonito aceitar que certos sentimentos não precisam de explicação, que existem no tempo e no espaço sem a necessidade de se concretizarem.

    É um eco suave de memórias nunca vividas, de histórias escritas apenas no coração. E, de certa forma, é um amor puro, livre de arrependimentos ou expectativas. Apenas um sentir, um saber, um levar consigo com carinho.

    A vida nos presenteia com esses instantes não ditos, e tudo bem deixá-los ali, na parte gentil do coração. Obrigada por esse texto que abraça, que entende e que nos permite simplesmente sentir. 💙

    BEIJOS

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  40. The day for businesses is a money-making day and florists do a good trade on that day, probably the best day of the year. It's a special day though for lovers when it comes around.

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  41. These words are beautiful Melody. Wonderful Post! Wishing you a great day!
    Rampdiary

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  42. This is such a poetically written and heartfelt post.
    I think we all have had those experience of instant connection like that, of feeling we share something special with that person. Sometimes it turns into love, sometimes into friendship and sometimes life takes us apart from people we feel connected to.
    As you say, life happens. It is OK to carry those people in our hearts. Love is always a good thing. Feeling love is wonderful. The important thing is to understand that we cannot control everything. It is alright to ask and wonder what could have been, but we should

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  43. Excelente Postagem.
    Acreditar que os "namorad@s" têm dia ou noite é como acreditar no Pai Natal. Em Comercialização é um Dia de excelência.
    A realidade pode variar desde que o modo da moda se torna obrigação de expressão dos mais jovens. Infelizmente, estes precisam de se afirmar no acto de cortejar @ "amad@", por falta de atitude, responsabilidade e madureza. É pena que a verticalidade não seja o caminho escolhido. As excepções devem ser mínimas... infelizmente.
    Renovo: fazes um trabalho magnífico e honesto para quem souber "ler-te". Parabéns.

    Beijo,
    SOL da Esteva

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  44. Nunca ninguém saberá se seria melhor de um jeito ou de outro, a vida é o que é e o que se proporciona... Cabe-nos vivê-la o melhor que formos capazes.
    Beijinhos.

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  45. Siempre he creido que en la vida tomamos buenas y malas decisiones, no obstante cuando ya se ha caminado un buen trecho de vida, sucede el "y si hubiera "la duda cae en ese terreno misterioso que no supimos atravesar, de igual modo todavía pienso que si no ocurrió fue porque no era para nosotros, él universo te lleva siempre donde debes estar,felicitaciones por esta entrada que sin dudas nos hace pensar y recordar.Te mando un abrazo grande!

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  46. Também passei por momentos especiais que me levantam a questão «como teria sido?»
    Tenho sorte porque se tratam de memórias doces e gratificantes...
    Quanto ao Dia de S Valentim, acho um dia simpático, por aqui alegra o álgido mês de Fevereiro, os ambientes e o comércio, as floristas...
    Cabe a cada um fazer do dia, algo realmente especial...
    As pessoas aprendem com os erros...
    Gostei de refletir sobre este tema.
    Passe pelo meu A Vivenciar... talvez goste.
    Um bom Fevereiro, Melody
    ~~~~~~~

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  47. Bardzo wzruszający post. Słuszny. Twoje słowa dotykają serca i duszy. Ja nigdy nie obchodziłam walentynek. Jakoś nie było mi to potrzebne do szczęścia. Nie przeszkadza mi że inni to kochają. Jeśli daje im to szczęście to w porządku. Każdy ma do tego prawo w wolnym świecie. Koleżanki w szkole dziwiły mi się czemu nie lubię i nie obchodzę walentynek, a ja odpowiadałam im : Każdy jest inny i trzeba to uszanować. Dziękuję Melody że podzieliłaś się z nami swoimi przemyśleniami na ten temat.

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  48. For me and Tim the most important thing about Valentine's Day is that it's our daughter's birthday, other then that it is just another day

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  49. Você tem razão, amiga, embora o Dia dos Namorados seja uma data festiva, o fato é que
    o relacionamento dos namorados não é tão festivo assim, ao contrário esta é uma relação com altos e baixos, ora vivem o tumulto e desavenças, embora existam casais de namorados que se preocupam um com outro.
    Uma boa semana,
    um abraço.

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  50. Oh, how beautiful! Happy Valentine's Day! 🙂✔🍀🙏💖😊

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  51. Beautiful post. I'm not a fan of Valentine's day. I feel there shouldn't be a day marked out to show someone how much you love. You should show them everyday.

    Annie,
    Annies Food Diary

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  52. Gosto do deu texto. Para mim o amor deve acontecer o ano inteiro. O dia dos namorados só serve para lembrar isso.
    Uma boa semana,
    Um beijo.

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  53. Set dates have the power to remind us of matters that are sometimes forgotten. But there are those who take advantage of them to bombard us with advertisements for things we don't even need.
    Excellent chronicle, I enjoyed reading and reflecting on the subject.
    Have a good week my dear friend.
    A kiss.

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  54. Amei o texto e eu sei que o amor é uma escolha diária, é perdão,paciência e persistência. E se pudermos aproveitar para sempre lembrar como tudo começou e a nossa escolha vale a pena mesmo que não precisemos de uma única data para isso.
    Beijos.



    https://www.parafraseandocomvanessa.com.br/

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  55. Walentynki, to miłe święto i stosunkowo młode u nas.
    Nie obchodzę go jakoś szczególnie bo okazujemy sobie z mężem uczucia na codzień. Nie mam jednak nic przeciwko uroczystemu traktowaniu tego dnia.
    Nie ukrywam, że wszechobecne poduszeczki, misiaczki, lizaczki i jabłuszka z nadrukiem, trochę mnie drażnią bo "miłość to nie pluszowy miś ..."jak śpiewa zespół Happysad w piosence"Zanim pójdę " :)
    Trafienie na idealnego partnera, to ogromne szczęście ale warto szukać bo szczęściu trzeba pomagać!
    Wszystkiego dobrego życzę i dziękuję za wartościowy post.
    Pozdrawiam cieplutko:)

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  56. Boa tarde e excelente segunda-feira, com muita paz e saúde minha querida amiga.

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  57. Achei lindo seu texto. É aquele sentimento do que nunca foi mas poderia ter sido. Podemos ficar indagando eternamente: e se eu tivesse falado com a pessoa? Tivesse dito como me sentia? Será que minha vida estaria melhor hoje se tivesse tomado outro rumo? Se eu estivesse com aquele alguém? Não dar pra saber. Melhor viver a vida e ser feliz sem pensar nisso. Beijos! :)

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  58. Very interesting post and reflections, thank you for the beautiful words,
    S

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  59. Boa tarde, Melody
    Ótima postagem, aqui no Brasil o dia dos namorados é comemorado no dia 12 de junho. Amor e perdão precisam andar de mãos dadas nos relacionamentos, um forte abraço.

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  60. This is was so beautifully written. We don't celebrate Valentine's at most we'll send each other a silly GIF. You shouldn't have a single day to express love for each other or for any of your loved ones. You should try to show your love and appreciation for them everyday.

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  61. Oi Melody, aqui no Brasil o dia dos namorados comemora-se no mês de julho e já fiquei inspirada, com suas palavras, em escrever sobre tudo isso daqui há alguns meses também.
    Você escreve de uma maneira muito cativante, parabéns mais uma vez!
    Mas o amor está em falta e existem tantas pessoas necessitando de um abraço!
    Beijos e uma excelente semana!!! :))))

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  62. That was a lovely read, Melody, thank you! To me, the older I get, the more I realize how very short life is, and how we need to express our love to our nearest and dearest...which can be anyone from close friends, to partners, to family.

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  63. Very beautiful post.

    www.paginasempreto.blogspot.com

    Best Regards

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  64. Sometimes there’s a quiet ache for something that never happened, but it’s okay to hold those feelings without regret. Life moves on, but those moments stay in our hearts.

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  65. Every day is a good day to celebrate. It's up to us how we spend it! Valentine's Day is a holiday of love - any kind of love. Also, and especially, family and friendship love. A special post. I will spend my Valentine's Day with my husband and son, it will be our first family Valentine's Day. I want to share the joy of this holiday with my parents and friends!

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  66. Hello!!
    I really enjoyed this post and identified with your words. I don't have a boyfriend but that doesn't stop me from celebrating Valentine's Day with the people I love, family and friends!
    I don't live in the past or think about what could have been if certain decisions had been made, it happened this way because I thought it was the best decision. But I think women who don't have a boyfriend or partner are a bit of a victim of bullying at the moment!

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  67. Dear Melody... the things that could have been... In a colorful, lived life like mine, there are of course many of them. Not just falling in love, but also job opportunities or other opportunities that I - for whatever reason - did not take. And many opportunities that I did take. There is always something to choose from and there are constraints, feelings, thoughts that make decisions one way or the other. And sometimes there is nothing to decide, it just happens. From these decisions and non-decisions, my life has become what it is - and it is good. Subtle melancholy now and again, that has probably happened over the course of my life, but... In Austria we say "Forget that HÄTTIWARI!" The strange compound dialect word stands for HÄTTE ICH (if I had) and WÄRE ICH (I would be). In other words: There is no point in thinking about "what if..."
    As for Valentine's Day - there is no tradition in Austria. The flower, perfume, jewelry, etc. industry and gastronomy naturally want to promote this holiday here too, but fortunately it is not as bad as Mother's Day (which also has no tradition here, but is already very much integrated). Love, friendship, good times - they do not need set holidays, we can celebrate them how and when and how often we want.
    All the best from Austria, Traude
    https://rostrose.blogspot.com/2025/01/4-tage-in-wien-ruckblick-2024-teil-3.htm
    PS: Beautiful photo!

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  68. true...love can't be spell in a word.... just silence...
    Have a great Valentine day
    # I am following you

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  69. This resonates deeply. Sometimes, there are connections that aren’t meant to be fully realised, but they stay with you in a quiet, bittersweet way. It’s that feeling of knowing something could have been, without ever needing to make it happen. A quiet understanding that some things are just meant to be carried in the heart, without regret or need for closure. It's a kind of peaceful feeling that reminds you of the beauty in unspoken moments.

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  70. 53 years of valentines with my lovely wife. Each a treasure trove of everything our love and life relationship could experience. a wonderful post.

    Hugs and blessings

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  71. Very sweet post and a good reminder Valentine's day is not just for lovers.Thank you for sharing your heart felt message at Love Your Creativity.

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